Do I Have Room in MY Inn?

Because I have a pretty sizable Desire, it’s taking me a long time to obtain.  Meaningful incremental Results are being obtained but sometimes it seems like I will never reach my final destination. It’s during these times of discouragement when I am most tempted to fill myself with alternative, smaller, less sustainable Desires that are easier to get a hold of right now.  I grab what I can and what I know will dull the pain or sorrow of my discouragement.  Thus I leave no room in my inn.  There is no vacancy.

The greater the Desire, the greater the sacrifice to obtain it.  And for me, much of the difficulty of that sacrifice has been Time.

So it works like this:  I’m going along on my journey.  My destination is far ahead but I have mile markers and Joy in the journey that usually keep me motivated.  But sometimes I come to the edge of a cliff, below which extends a deep ravine for miles to the right and to the left.  There is  seemingly no way across.   

Watch clip from Percy Jackson Movie

This is when I begin to look around at the scenery.  There is a village nearby.   I stop for a while.  There are some good restaurants and activities that are okay fun for me.  Or maybe I’ll take a nap.  Sleeping sounds really good right now. The village doesn't always serve as a "Lotus Casino" for me.  Usually it is filled with very worthy places to eat and things to do.  It's all about good, better and best choices.  The pathway I've been on represents my best choice.

Staying too long in the villages of my life causes me to forget about my journey for a while.  It was really stressful when I last thought about it because there seemed no way to continue.  In fact it seemed impossible.  I might as well hang out in the village while I’m waiting.  Maybe in a few days, weeks, months, or years something will change so I can cross that ravine.  So I partake of the goodies.  I keep myself nice and busy in all kinds of nothingness until I am utterly sick of it all. 

The problem with staying here and filling myself with this alternative reality is that it is not enough for me.  It doesn’t fill me like the real journey does.  When I’m on track, moving at a clipping pace, there is nothing like that kind of Joy.  It’s just these doggone ravines that keep getting in my way!  Eventually, because I have tasted that far superior Joy, I have to get back on the trail.  I have to figure out a way over that ravine.

When I come to the ravines of my life it is important for me not to turn to Conflicting Causes who offer a level of Joy that cannot sustain me.  This is the time to make sure I’m not filling the space inside me with less important things.  It’s crucial to save a room in my inn for that all important guest.   

Joan of Arc

And if I’m not careful I just may miss him because he’s not going to come dressed up in royal robes with trumpets broadcasting his glory loud and clear.  That comes later…in the end.  Right now I’m being tested to see if I can identify him even though he might be dressed in less than regal attire.  Instead of trumpets blasting, I hear a sweet, tender, quiet melody that reaches the very depths of my heart.
 

Waiting for him isn’t about idleness.  It’s about two things:

• Not consuming for my physical and spiritual nourishment less important things that are too low in their sustainable Peace
• Not engaging in physical and spiritual activities that merely keep me busy but fail to return a higher degree of sustainable Energy, motivation, excitement

Sinéad O'Connor:  "Nothing Compares 2 U"

When the going gets tough I have found that the sacrifice it takes for me to stay allegiant to my journey, to my desired destination, and to my Cause is extremely difficult but powerful.  And with this kind of power, I make a statement etched in stone of who I am and what I’ll be.  This time of waiting is a time of mourning.  It is a time of fasting.  It conveys the depth of sorrow I feel because of the distance that still separates me from my desired destination.

Be Still = Waiting = Balanced Processing = Moving along

 Listen:  "Move Along" by the All American Rejects 

It is during times like these that I have come to understand the next step to obtaining my Desire.  A step I wasn’t previously aware of.  This new perspective on how to cross the ravine is given to me only after I’m seemingly tested for a period of Time to see if I will give up and be filled with the available distractions or persevere to find a way across.  It is through these probationary Processes that my Cause determines the level of sustainable Joy I need to reside in continuously.  If I’m continuously content with the distractions, then that will most likely be the end of my journey.  That village becomes my desired destination.

Listen:  "Slow Down" by Jenny Jordan Frogley

Thus, I recognize I have to make a space in my life.  I can’t fill my Inn with alternative guests.  I must fast from certain things I could consume as well as certain activities that might fit in the keyhole but don’t have the power to actually unlock the door.  There is such a thing as short term pleasure and meaningless business that lifts my spirits in the moment.  But it always comes to an end, leaving me in a state that can never satisfy.

Because my journey is long, I have realized that I need to do three things:

D&C 130:7; D&C 93:21

• Always have my next mile marker in sight (Future) 
• Pay attention to the Joy I feel right now (Present)
• Regularly look back at what I have already achieved (Past)

This keeps me motivated.  It gives me a more powerful shield to use against tempting villages.  And it creates an ability inside of me that is SUSTAINABLE.

Read:   Focus and Priorities by Dallin H. Oaks

The Degrees of Meaning

When I read words about heaven or hell, good or evil, eternal life or damnation, singing the song of redeeming love or weeping, wailing, and gnashing of teeth, I don’t immediately see how they apply to my daily life.  I think hell is for all those murderers and the like.  Evil is what they do.  Damnation is what’s going to happen to them which will cause them to weep, wail, and gnash their teeth in regret for what they have done. Those are all the bad guys.  And then heaven is for all those saintly people.  Good works are what they do.  Eternal life is what’s going to happen to them which will cause them to sing songs of redeeming love.  Those are all the good guys.

But since those two portraits seem so abstract and distant to me, they don’t really impact my daily choices.  When I look at these words as concepts that can be broken down into degrees, I can better see what they have to do with me.  It’s not an all or nothing deal.  It’s always incremental.

The All or Nothing Deal

Pure Justice is receiving the complete Result for what we are right now.  It’s judgment day right now.  No if, ands, or buts.  No time to get it right.  No training.  We either go to heaven or hell right now. 

Justice + Time = Mercy

Mercy adds Time to Justice.  It is receiving warning/confirming Effects incrementally on our journey right now.  It’s Teaching/Learning Day right now knowing that judgment day is on its way.  There are ifs, ands, and buts.  There is time to get it right but get it right we must.  We are in training.  It’s not the time to sit around in a make-shift paradise.  It’s time to work on achieving the Balance we want to reside in eternally.  It’s time to work on achieving that paradise that satisfies us completely and continuously.

Justice + Space = Mercy on Judgment Day

Mercy also adds Space to Justice.  Justice is living with someone and being subject to their Process however Balanced or Imbalanced it is.  Their Process = our Effects.  And our Process = their Effects.  There are some people we’re okay with living next door to.  There are some people we’d prefer to live a few states away from.  And there are some people with whom we would rather not be on the same planet.  

Listen:  "Imagine" by Amy Grant

On the other hand, there are some people we want to be around all the time.  We would even like to live in the same house as them.  And maybe one of them we would like to live with in the same room.  We just need to make sure we’re becoming someone who they want to live with that closely. 

Whose neighborhood do you want to live in?

And so what does your heaven look like?  Who would you most like to be with in that heaven?  Who would you most like to live in your house?

Listen:  "This is Your Life" by Switchfoot

 

Meaning + Degrees = Mercy

Mercy also adds degrees to black and white concepts such as damnation vs. eternal life, heaven vs. hell, good vs. evil.

If we talk about those words in their pure meaning, we are looking at Justice--Truth.  Because of Mercy, it’s not black and white.  Instead it’s degrees of Heaven and degrees of Hell.  Black, Shades of gray, and White (Alma 42:25).

The Degrees of Meaning

So let’s look at a couple of  these words to see how they might be affecting us right now in our daily lives.

Damnation:  Dam (noun):  a barrier, typically of concrete, constructed to hold back water

(verb):  hold back or obstruct

What in my life am I being held back from right now?  What is obstructing me?  What is preventing me from obtaining my Desires?

 
Eternal Life:  Eternal (adjective) continuous, everlasting, continuity, unbroken, without interruption, constant, steady, unchanging, habitual

What things in my life are continuous?  What habits am I developing?  What abilities am I acquiring?  What talents am I fostering?  What relationships am I building RIGHT NOW?

You see what I mean.  So when I study any book on self improvement especially the scriptural books that use words that I can’t apply to my life right here and right now, I stop and define the overall meaning of those words.  Once I have it, I apply it to my daily processes. 

Eternity Is Happening Right Now

My eyes have to be wide open because this is it RIGHT NOW.  This is the time to get ready for that state that I want to live in eternally.  I seriously want to be the same kind of person as the person I fervently desire to hang out with eternally.  Eternity is not only a future state, it is also happening right now.

I don’t allow myself to think words like hell-fire, everlasting pits of darkness, chains of hell, bondage, and bands of death have nothing to do with me.  And I want to know what is meant by words like the fire of the Spirit, everlasting Joy, bonds of love, drinking of the waters of life freely, and the fruit of the tree of life so I can identify what is really at stake here and what exactly it is that’s being offered.

So what is hell-fire?  Have you ever experienced it?  What are the waters of life?  Have you been drinking from them?  What does that feel like?  Where does the water flow best?  Where is it dammed up?

Listen:  "Too Late" by Amy Grant

If I Perish, I Perish

Esther (see Bible Hero Posters)

“..and so will I go in unto the king, which is not according to the law:  and if I perish, I perish.”  Thus is the epic response of a Jewish girl who, after becoming the queen of Persia, put her life on the line to save her people (Esther 4:16).

Vashti

Esther’s story begins with Vashti, the first wife of the king of Persia, king Ahasuerus.  In Persia in ancient days the rule was that everyone had to obey the king, even the queen.  He summoned her to appear before the people at one of his great feasts and she refused to come.  So he got pretty angry.  After consulting with his chamberlains, he decided her punishment was to end her career as his queen.

But later on he missed her.  He needed a wife. 

Now there was another rule in Persia.  Once the king decreed something it couldn’t be reversed, not even by himself.  This rule is also seen played out in the story of Daniel and the Lion’s Den (see Daniel 6:8).   Consequently the king’s princes and chamberlains sometimes tricked the king into signing a law that was too general in order to get rid of a specific person they didn’t like.  All they had to do was gratify his pride in the presentation of it so he would be blind to consider the possible ramifications that he may not be so in favor of.

So even if king Ahasuerus missed Vashti, he couldn’t get her back because of the decree.  His Servants then suggested that he send officers out to round up all “the fair young virgins” in the kingdom (Esther 2:3) and bring them to the palace.  And it was done.

After their purification, these young women were presented before the king so he could choose which one he liked best.

Enter Esther.

Esther’s real name was Hadassah.  She was brought up by her cousin Mordecai because both of her parents had passed away.  Their ancestors had once resided in Jerusalem but after the king of Babylon attacked it, he carried off a bunch of Jewish people to be held captive in his own country.  By the time Mordecai and Esther came on the scene, their people were subject to the king’s commands but basically lived normal lives.  Thus Esther was one of “the fair young virgins” that were gathered into the palace. 

During her year of purification she pleased the “keeper of the women” so much that he favored her.  He made sure she had everything she needed.  Sounds kind of like Joseph and his propensity to reach sustainability wherever he was (see blog post Spin the Story). 

It’s important to note at this point in the story that Esther did not tell anyone that she was Jewish according to Mordecai’s instructions.

The day came when Esther was brought before the king.  When a woman was going to be presented before the king she could ask for anything she desired.  I assume many women took advantage of this offer and decked themselves out with stuff.  But Esther “required nothing but what…the keeper of the women appointed.”  And yet she “obtained favor in the sight of all them who looked upon her” (Esther 2:15).

When she was taken before the king he fell head over heals in love with her and put the royal crown on her head.  She became the new queen of Persia.

Haman

Later on, as the story goes, the king reorganized his palace staff advancing a man named Haman to the top prince seat.  And it was the rule that everyone should reverence, bow, show respect to Haman when he walked by. 

Mordecai, Esther's cousin, was a regular at the king’s gate so whenever Haman walked by everyone around him bowed.  But he didn’t.  One day Haman noticed this and was very angry about the whole thing.  So he devised a plan to get revenge.  He knew that Mordecai was Jewish so he told the king that there was “a certain people scattered abroad…among the people in all the provinces of thy kingdom” and (now paraphrasing) “they don’t obey your law.  So you shouldn’t put up with them.  Are you okay with signing this decree that all of them should be killed.  I’ll even pay for it” (Esther 3:8-15).

And the king agreed!  Okay, this isn’t the point of the story but wouldn’t you think he would be more careful signing decrees when he knew they couldn't be reversed?  And we’re talking genocide here.  Because Esther never told anyone including the king that she was Jewish, he had no idea what he was doing to her in signing that document.

So the letters went out by post to all the king’s provinces.  All of the soldiers and government officials in those areas were to annihilate the Jewish people and rob them of all their stuff on Adar 13^th (Adar is the name of the month).

When Mordecai heard of this he was pretty upset, not to mention the entire kingdom.  Everybody wondered, What the heck? 

Esther found out through Mordecai.  He then instructed her to go unto the king and beg him to save her people.  But guess what!  There was another crazy law.  No one could come unto the king unless he called them.  Okay.  Hmm…sounding more and more egocentric all the time.  If someone did go unto the king and he didn’t hold out the golden scepter, he or she would be put to death.

Listen:  "Need You Now (How Many Times)" by Plumb

Esther’s life was on the line and obviously her first response was to avoid the whole ordeal if possible.  A healthy desire (Matt 26:39).  But then Mordecai told her (partial paraphrase):

“Don’t think that you’re going to escape this genocide of our people just because you are in the king’s house.  If you don’t do anything, then we will be delivered by someone else.  But you will be destroyed.  So Esther, think of it this way:  What if you were brought to this very position in the kingdom for such a time as this?” (Esther 4:13-14)

He spun the story.  Her reply? Again partially paraphrased:

“Go, gather all of our people in Shushan and fast for me.  Don’t eat or drink for three days and nights.  My maidens and I will do the same.  Then I will go in unto the king, which is totally against the law:  and if I perish, I perish.” (Esther 4:16)

If I perish, I perish.   

I have to believe that we all have an overall destiny.  I can’t believe that random chaos reigns.  I believe that chaos and its subsequent random causes do indeed exist.  But every cell of my body cries out for a overarching order, a purpose, a destiny.  A Master Organizer organizing things that tend to get unorganized.  

Not only does Esther's response apply to those epic decisions we have to make in our lives but it also applies to the seemingly small choices we must make on a daily basis in order to finally arrive at our desired destination.  And when I take enough time to figure out what commitments I know I need to keep every single day, especially the unremarkable ones (yet totally hard ones for me to keep consistently), it helps me more than I can describe to say in my mind with Esther, if I perish, I perish.  The issue is that I will do whatever God wants me to do regardless of what seems to be my very possible impending death.  What logically must occur if this is my credo is to ensure that I have spent enough time developing my ability to communicate with him through experience and sacrifice.  I need to be sure my sacrifices are in alignment with his will (Samuel 15:22).

The king did hold out his golden scepter.  Esther’s life was spared.  And eventually she was able to tell him what Haman did and that she herself was Jewish.  The king was angry with Haman for manipulating him like that so off to the gallows he was sent.  Actually the rest of the story is well worth the read.  It is evidence that “Karma” (the Master Organizer) is indeed alive and exact in his own kingdom.  But we’ll save that for another day.  It is sufficient to say that the Jewish people were basically given the right to bear arms and defend themselves against anyone who attempted to assault them or take their property on that fateful day.

Esther

Spin the Story

Spin the Story is a phrase I use to indicate the way we evaluate events in our lives.  It is a method of Cause attribution. 

So here’s an example:

Joseph was the son of Jacob (Israel) and the second-to-the-youngest of 12 sons.  They lived in the land of Canaan near a place that was later known as Bethlehem.  Jacob favored Joseph out of all of his sons.  He made him a coat of many colors that symbolized this preference.  So Joseph’s brothers hated him.  They were jealous and couldn’t talk to him nicely at all.

Joseph had a couple of dreams that he told to his family.  They indicated that he would one day rule over them.  They evaluated these events with Envy.  His older brothers were so obsessed with their Envy that one day they threw Joseph into a pit and were going to leave him for dead. 

   

But then a merchant caravan heading to Egypt came by so they decided instead to sell him into slavery for twenty pieces of silver.  They then killed a goat, put its blood on Joseph’s coat and brought it back to their father so that he would believe Joseph had been killed by a wild animal.

Pretty hard times for Joseph.

In Egypt a man named Potiphar bought Joseph as a servant.  Joseph served Potiphar with total honesty and loyalty.  Everything with which Potiphar entrusted Joseph resulted in sustainability.  So Potiphar promoted Joseph to be the overseer of his house. 

But the master’s wife had her eye on Joseph to the extent that one day she made a pass at him.  Joseph got the heck out of there ASAP which offended the woman.  She then told Potiphar a lie:  Joseph had sexually harassed her.  Potiphar was way mad and cast him into prison.

Pretty hard times for Joseph.  He reaches sustainability and then is cut down again.

In prison, Joseph served the keeper with total honesty and loyalty.  Again Joseph was entrusted with responsibility and authority.  And in time even within the prison, the system reached sustainability.  But Joseph was in there for years. 

The leader of Egypt was called Pharaoh.  Some of Pharaoh’s officers had been cast into the prison in which Joseph was held.  They had some dreams.  Joseph knew how to interpret dreams as metaphors.  He interpreted these men’s dreams and within a short time the interpretations came to pass. One of the imprisoned officers, the Chief Butler, was set free.  Joseph had asked him to remember him when he got out.  But he forgot him…until the Pharaoh himself had a reoccurring dream that was driving him crazy and no one’s interpretation satisfied him.  It was then that the Chief Butler remembered Joseph and told Pharaoh that there was a Hebrew guy in the prison who could interpret dreams.

Pharaoh sent for Joseph and related the dream to him.  Joseph interpreted it and even offered him counsel on how to resolve the conflict the dream indicated was forthcoming.  And Pharaoh was satisfied.  He believed the interpretation and felt it was right.  Consequently he appointed Joseph to a position of responsibility and authority in preparation for the forecasted famine.

For 7 years Egypt had plenty of water and thus food.  Joseph was assigned to be the project manager of a massive preparedness effort, filling huge storage units with grain.  After those 7 years of plenty, Egypt and all the lands around it were pounded with a drought so severe that a sustainable supply of food could not be produced.  Joseph opened the stores and managed their distribution not only to Egypt’s residents but also to all the countries around it.

Meanwhile Joseph’s father and his eleven sons were also suffering under the famine.  And it came to the point where they had to go to Egypt for support.  Jacob sent his older sons to go buy the corn.

Joseph saw them coming.  He most likely was watching for them.  My guess is that a group of 10 Hebrew brothers would stick out like a sore thumb in Egypt.  Joseph basically disguised himself and his voice so that he appeared to them as an Egyptian governor and no one they would know.  Joseph was a full grown man by then with a wife and two kids of his own whereas when they sold him he was still a boy.   

His brothers didn’t recognize him.  He gave them a hard time, was stern with them, and played a few tricks on them.  And through this subterfuge he heard of their regret for what they did to their younger brother (himself) years ago.  They had been living with this pain in their hearts for years.  He also manipulated them into bringing back to Egypt Benjamin, Joseph’s younger brother whom he loved and who had not taken part in his older brothers’ hatred.  Finally in the end Joseph revealed himself to them.

And this is how he spun the story:

“I am Joseph your brother, whom ye sold into Egypt…be not grieved, nor angry with yourselves, that ye sold me hither:  for God did send me before you to preserve life...to preserve you a posterity in the earth, and to save your lives by a great deliverance.  So now it was not you that sent me hither, but God: and he hath made me a father to Pharaoh, and lord of all his house, and a ruler throughout all the land of Egypt (Genesis 45:4-8).

Sustainability

So we all know his brothers were the ones who thought up the plan to do bad things to him.  Yet Joseph attributes the Cause to God.  He said it was God that sent him there.  Why the heck would he say that?  Why would he believe that God was in charge all the time?  Why would he believe that God actually allows bad things to happen to us in order to fulfill his greater, more long-term plans of sustainability?  And is God really in charge of those things?  Is he really more powerfully omniscient than anyone who could do bad things to us?  And will he really promote our personal, spiritual, and temporal sustainability so that in the end he might use us to help others including the very ones who did bad things to us?  And if so, is that why it’s important to Spin the Story?  And when we do, is that what enables us to endure, to forgive, and to actually reach sustainability while still in servitude, bondage, impossible situations, or circumstances out of our control?

I would have to say Yes to all of these questions.  And this is why Spin the Story is one of the most powerful tools we can use to stay out of mental bondage when we go through hard times.

Listen:  He Reigns by Newsboys